An Update, A Story, And Some Rambles…

Missing in Action! — That’d be me! 😉

Seriously tho. I’m back! — Forgive me?

Mini Update: I finally finished the multiple edits I was working on! — Last Thursday. So, a week ago. — Lemme just tell you. Reading through your own work over & over & over… & over again… is tedious and not exactly a boon for self-confidence! 😉 — By the time I was finished I was like I never want to look at this again. — But that was a week ago and I don’t feel so strongly now.

I’ve set it to the side and handed it off to several people to read for some general feedback and fresh eyes. — And while that’s going on I’ve started book 2! — Roughly 7,000 words in. Not too bad. — Gonna put the petal to the metal with it and knock it out as quickly as possible.

Also! — Book cover is in the works. (For book 1) — When it’s complete I will start promoting it much more heavily. — This is all very new and the whole process is a learn as I go sort of thing. So that’s what I’m doing. — One step at a time. — I’m sure when I hit this stage for book 2 everything will fly a bit faster because I will have done it before. — That always helps. — In fact, Book 2 is already progressing faster than the first one did. So there’s that!

Let’s see! What else can I tell you? — Oh. I had my first break down over this whole thing. — Story Time!! —

I handed it off for some people to read last Thursday. Friday night my husband and I had to run up to the grocery store and he ran in real quick to get something.

Well my Mom read it Thursday night and called Friday while we were on the way to the store. — She couldn’t really talk at the time so she didn’t say much about it. It’s not like she said, aye this sucks. She just said she finished it and then she had to go. — But oh boy.

After Jeremy hung up, I pulled into the parking lot, and he ran inside. And that’s about the time it hit me like a ton of bricks. — I started balling. Just sitting in the car sobbing.

It hit me that this was it. I never really thought past writing it. — You know people are going to read it and you know they’re going to judge it. But knowing that and knowing someone has actually read it and have now judged it… Well, that’s entirely different!\

It was at that moment I realized the reality of it all. I don’t just write books. I have to let people read them too. What a concept, right?  — It’s scary! — I was terrified, I’m still terrified. Y’all don’t even know. Or maybe you do!

My husband got back in the car and was like… Uhh… What is happening right now? — 😀 & can’t say as I blame him, I was not crying pretty like Carrie, okay? Those were ugly tears!

And when we got back home, I was better, but not great. Because before we left I was like, okay, I need to start book 2 while I get things done for book 1. I need to be doing things at all times. — And I got home and was like, no. Why bother? Book 1 may be the worst thing ever written, why bother with the second one? — It was so self-depreciating, y’all. I can’t even.

Ya know what I did though? I fired up my lap top and did it anyway! — I reminded myself that no one else’s thoughts or opinions have the power to define me or control my actions… unless I give it to them. Unless I let it. — So I started book 2.

There will be people who don’t like my work, just as there will be people who do. I know this. Knowing it and experiencing it will definitely be two completely different things. — As my break down in the car can attest to. — Thank God it was nighttime. That was a crowded parking lot. lol!

But I won’t quit. I’ll keep pushing. — I’ll fall apart. I’ll get fed up. I’ll get excited. I’ll succeed. I’ll fail. I’ll get tired. I’ll make progress. I’ll want to quit. I’ll want to keep going. — I’ll run the gamut of emotions and that’ll be okay. — I’ll come out on the other side. 🙂

So there’s an update, a story, and some rambles! — Enjoy guys!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

8 Comments Add yours

  1. I can LOVE my story and be happy with what I’ve accomplished until the moment I hand it over to someone else to read. Then I am convinced it’s the worst piece of crap ever written and if I get good feedback that they’re “just being nice.”
    Confidence is something I wish I had.

    1. I can definitely relate. I’m confident in what I’ve written… right up until I share it with other people… and then I’m like, oh noooo… I’m a fraud who can’t string together a coherent sentence. — Usually I go exercise for a while & run through my story in my head over & over until I’m like, no wait. It’s good. I got this. 🙂 — Whether that’s from a rush of endorphins or because my work is actually good is another matter entirely. 😂

  2. mylilplace says:

    Don’t give up and just keep going like you have. It must not be easy…I cannot even begin to imagine what it feels like. Keep writing, though…I know your love for writing is strong and that everything will turn out okay.

    1. Thank you! That’s very sweet. — It’s funny, I started blogging roughly 5 years ago and I used to be terrified every time I published a post. But now I don’t even blink. — I’m sure it’ll be much the same and it’ll get better one day. Hopefully, at least! 🙂

      1. mylilplace says:

        I am glad to hear that you have gotten over your fears. I still worry every time I press the publish button. 🙂 Still working on getting over my fears but it has definitely gotten a little easier. The only friend who learned that I am blogging recently told me to write as if no one will read it. 🙂 Still trying…but it’s so worthwhile, I think.

      2. It does tend to get a little easier eventually. I’m sure you’ll get there in no time. 🙂 & if writing as if no one will read it helps, then I say use that. — My brain always said, but someone will read it. Lol. Which didn’t help at all. — When I get nervous now I just remind myself that even if someone doesn’t like something… It doesn’t matter. Because somewhere out there, someone does. & that helps me. 🙂 — Keep trying! It’s def worth while! ❤😊

      3. mylilplace says:

        You have a point there…everyone has her/his own preferences and not everyone can like my work. It’s good to always remember that. It’s true for everything we do…not just writing. 🙂

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